Attention

It has been brought to my attention that there are those that think I was trying to suggest what may have brought about this divorce by my last post. I want to make it clear that I had and have no such intentions of doing that. I will state plainly that I have no desire to trash Josh or his family on this blog. It has been purely a place for me to lay out my feelings and thoughts. I was not hinting that Josh did any of the examples of what men may do to break out hearts. I was simply trying to say that he broke mine and that it hurts. The examples were there so that others may relate or try to understand some of the situations women go through that can break their hearts. It was meant to be a message of hope. I will tell you that I know Josh was unhappy. I know there were things that I did that he didn't like, but that is part of being married. I know that there are reasons for why Josh was done, I just don't know what they were. I know many of the things that he complained about me doing, but none of them are a reason to divorce someone. I never wanted to divorce Josh. I didn't want to sign those papers. I didn't want to stop trying. NO, I am NOT perfect. And guess what! I know that more than anyone that guesses at how I am feeling will ever realize. I do not accuse Josh of anything other than giving up. I still love him and I still think he is a good man. Trust me, I do own up to the things that I did that caused problems in our marriage. I also addressed every single thing that Josh ever complained about me doing. In the end it didn't matter. He was so caught up in whatever made him decide to divorce me that it didn't matter! It makes me so sad to think that when I am trying to share my hope with others and to help them have hope in their lives that there are those that only see it as me trying to make Josh look like the bad guy and to make myself look all perfect. I am doing my best to move on and it has helped me to think that others can learn from the feelings that I am having. I am NOT judging Josh. I cannot because I don't really know what happened. Am I upset at him? YES!!! Do I hate him and desire to slander him? NO! He was a very important part of my life. Those that think I'm trying to do harm to him, take your own advice, "Judge not that ye be not judged".