Beginning Counseling Again

This week I went to my normal counselor and it was absolutely terrible. I went to my parents house afterwards and by the time I got there I was bawling my eyes out. My dad helped me decide then and there that I needed a new counselor. My dad knew of a man in Ogden and told me to get an appointment with him. I was able to get one for two and a half weeks later. That isn't too bad for him at all. Well, by some miracle they had a cancelation five minutes after I spoke with his secretary on the phone. I by some miracle was also able to reschedule all my lessons that day for the next day and so I took the hour and a half drive up to Ogden. It was worth it. My counselor, Gene, is on track. he counsels by the spirit and that's what I want! he helped me realize a lot of wonderful things. One that I wish I had known earlier is that because of the type of marriage I had and my divorce I will get insecure when I get in a relationship with someone and it starts to go somewhere. I saw this happen in my last relationship and I do feel that I messed with the relationship some. I mean when we first started dating I was confident and happy then as my feelings grew the more insecure I become about every action I did. He noticed it and I wished with all my heart I could have stopped feeling that way, but I couldn't. What Gene told me is that I need let whomever I'm in dating relationship with know (once I have started to develop strong feelings for) that I'm going to hit an insecure dip. It will pass, but I need them to work through it with me. At least I know it now and I can be prepared for it myself. Knowing this has helped me stop beating myself up. My security with myself is on a consistent rise and I just need to keep it going. I'm looking forward to being 100% confident again instead of about 82%.... P.s. Go to the temple and do initiatories if you can, when you're feeling down. You can't help but feel better when you do.